Pursuing Thea (Naomi)

From Toosigma

Title	Pursuing Thea
Author	Philip Mann - Naomi
Campaign	Convergent Threads
Session	Intersession
Posted
Game Date

Making-up with Kayli just days before I had to leave again made me feel better, but I don't think it really sank in until I returned without Hero and Maerin. When I opened the door and saw the honest love and longing in those beautiful green eyes, I felt as though I was returning from a journey of many months. We did not make love as we have before due to the late afternoon hour, but we more than made up for it when we returned after her performance.

We entered the Eyrie after it was closed for the night. I looked deliberately at my brother and beamed. He smiled and nodded back at me as Kayli pulled me downstairs to our bedroom. I closed the door behind us and fixed my most seductive look. With just a word I stopped Kayli before she darkened the room. When she turned, she met my eyes and lost whatever thoughts she had other than wanting to be with me.

“Tonight love,” I said in the most sultry voice I could manage, “I watched you perform and now it is your turn to watch...”

I sauntered toward her with my eyes fixed on hers. The expression on her face let me know right away that my play to her was working and that she was already becoming very aroused.

“God you are beautiful,” she breathed.

I began a slow and sensual dance around the room and around her. My body moved to the rhythm of our passion, touching, caressing, kissing, slowly pulling her into my dance. Minutes stretched by as I undressed both of us and entwined my naked form around hers. I missed touching her and my whole body let her know...

We made love for several hours and then we cuddled and talked. Before my confession to her we always spoke of dreamy things, of the abstracts in the now and in the future. This evening however, she asked me about my latest adventure. I described it to her as I had in the past, generally glossing over the details. I had gotten into a practice of ignoring the risky portions that I didn't think she wanted to hear, and making the whole thing seem safer than it probably was. This time she asked for more detail about everything from what I carried with me to how I felt when different things happened.

“Naomi,” she began as she looked up into my eyes, “why did you jump onto the shark instead of fighting it from the Sea Dart?”

“I thought the best way to keep it from attacking the vessel again was to give it something more important to worry about,” I replied. “If the others could escape losing just me, then I would have succeeded.”

“How can you say that?” she demanded. “Does your own life mean so little to you that you would throw it away at every opportunity?”

“Kayli,” I said softly, “Fate wove the skein of my life long ago as she did the lives of all. If I lived a life of comfort and safety I would only live a lesser life, not a longer one.”

“What is the use then, if everyone will die in their time? Are you really saving them then?”

“Love,” I explained, “the course and length of our lives are determined, but the path we take and how much pain we must endure to get there is in our hands.”

Kayli thought for a moment as the realization of what I said washed over her. “So you put yourself in harms way to keep others from suffering.”

“Yes, love,” I told her. “I...”

“You are incredible!” Kayli interrupted me as a gentle smile of knowing spread across her lovely face. “You truly do care more about others than you do yourself.”

“Yes, love, I do.” I told her.

Kayli was silent for a moment as she stretched her arms and legs across me. “I don't know that I have the faith in Fate that you do, but I thank her for bringing us together.”

“As do I, love, every moment of the day.”

“I am so lucky,” she said as she moved up to gently kiss me. “I am so lucky that you choose to be with me when you aren't out saving the world.”

“I would be with no other if not you,” I replied.

We talked for a while longer but sleep soon overtook Kayli. She lay snuggled close to me, so warm against my skin. She looked so beautiful, so peaceful as she lay, and I pulled the covers over her to keep her warm. She murmured something in her sleep that I could not make out, but it sounded wonderful just coming from her lips.

I watched her sleep and I considered what she and I had been through so far. I thought of how we met and became inseparable friends, how we worked together through the evening and played during the day. Her bashful demeanor that belied such a magnetic personality that began to draw me in. The calendar showed so few weeks, but it seemed like years that we knew each other when my heart began to wonder if there was more. I remembered, now fondly, our embarrassing encounter that was soon followed by her brave confession of budding love. The wonder of new love, love that might be wrong and disappear at any moment, love that felt so pure and light was all-consuming in its uncertainty and promise.

Now, after our first real trial, our love is more mature and feels somehow tested. I could have kept the truth from her, but I did not. She could have cast me away, but she did not. Our hearts have shown that our principles guide us true, and that our path is together. Looking into my memories of her parents, I can see how their love must have been strengthened by difficulties that they have overcome. I wondered briefly if Thea's family, so fragmented as her description made it appear, is an example of self-interest conquers instead of love. Oh, how different my life might be if Fate had not guided me to my adoptive family.

In her letter to me, my love spoke of the power that makes her want to risk her heart to be with me as the same power that draws me to adventure. I thought long on the last day before I returned home on this and wondered if I could ever give up adventuring to be with her. For now, I had to answer “no”. Not because I love adventure more than I love her, but because there are too many unanswered questions about myself and where I come from. I feel very much that each adventure takes me closer to the answers I seek, and closer to knowing myself at least as much as I know the beautiful woman sleeping in my arms.

As the time arrived to greet the dawn I looked down at Kayli and was pleasantly surprised to see her sleepily looking back at me.

“Shall we go?” she asked through a yawn.

I smiled at her and replied, “Yes, love, we shall.”

We got out of bed and dressed together without speaking. I think we smiled at each other as much as to ourselves as we basked in the warmth of each other's presence. Together, we stood before the door and reached for each other. Wordlessly, we gently kissed and hugged for a long moment before opening the door and journeying to the dim outside.

As we walked through the streets to meet the dawn we were greeted by a few of the regulars that we would see later that night. Some were just waking and waved to us out of their windows, while others, like Maudy, were ending their day as we were beginning ours.

I met Maudy my second night at the Eyrie and liked him right away. He is a kindly man who walks with a slight limp, but always manages a pleasant comment. For work, the city pays him to sweep the streets of the district at night and generally keep the public areas straightened up. He wakes late and begins his days at the Eyrie well after dark with a couple of fellows he works with. He always sits at the bar though his cup is filled with rich coffee rather than ale. Mama and papa talk to him at length when there is a lull, and they seem to know him from some time ago. On Kayli's advice however, I have never asked them about anything or anyone that could tie into the war. Sometimes I think that papa wants to talk to me about it, but I know he doesn't want to upset mama by opening old wounds.

Kayli and I held each other as the sun rose high into the sky. I took my eyes off of the horizon and admired how the sun set her hair ablaze. I silently thanked Fate for this moment and prayed for many more.

We stood from the bench, but as I stepped to leave she wrapped her arms around me. She pulled me tight to her and let out a sigh, then she said something I did not expect.

“When are you going to see her again?” she asked.

Every part of my body tensed as her question chilled me to the bone. My mind whirled as innumerable questions vied for dominance. Had she changed her mind about us? Was she giving me an opening to leave her life so that she didn't have to do the leaving?

Sensing my confusion she said as she turned me to face her. “Oh, don't worry my dear,” she began with a light chuckle before becoming warmly serious. “I want you to find the answers you need, and do whatever you must to find them. If Thea holds the key to even one small piece of your past then I know you must see her again. I just want you to tell me everything as I want you to tell me everything about any of your adventures.”

I was simultaneously shocked and relieved by what she said, but she was patient for my response. “Um, love, I had not really thought about when I would see her again.”

“Well,” she smiled as she took my hand and we began to walk back home. “I suppose I'm a bit surprised she has not sought you out now that she knows you are alive.”

“I suppose you are right,” I said. “Maybe she is afraid of me.”

Kayli laughed, “Right, maybe she's afraid of me! Though she should at least be jealous. From what you have told me about her and her family, I cannot imagine she could live long without you, my exotic elven goddess, having met you.”

I would have blushed if I could. “Oh, you flatter me so much more than I deserve.”

“Your modesty is something that I love about you,” she said. “You have brought so much joy to our family that it is difficult to envision how we smiled at all during the two years before you arrived.”

“I cannot imagine life without you, all of you.”

We meandered though the streets and continued talking about everything, and nothing in particular. We window shopped some of the stores on the way as we had done many times, eventually reaching the front of the Eyrie.

As I reached for the door, Kayli grabbed my hand and asked, “So, what will you do next?”

I thought for a moment and then replied, “I suppose I should go to the University, to the library there, to read all that I can about Xen'drik and the history of the elves. Those seem to be common roots in my past so far.”

“I hope you find your answers soon,” she said with a wistful smile. She understood that going to the University would certainly take me closer to Thea.

I fixed a reassuring smile. “Love, I wish there was another way...”

“I know,” she said. “You do what you must and I'll concentrate on my singing while you are away. That way,” she smiled earnestly, “you will have resolved the mystery of your past, and my career will be far enough along that we can tell my parents.”

I was a little shocked that she was the one who brought up her parents. “I suppose, love, that means I should waste no time.”

“I can't see why we wouldn't want to make the most out of our situation,” she commented. “Take what time you need, but please not a minute longer.”

I smiled even wider. “I will hurry, love, and I will not rest until I have my answers.”

We went inside and Kayli went to rehearsal at the Diamond Theater while I headed out to the library. For three days I parted from Kayli after our morning walk and returned to the Eyrie in time to help in the evening. It became a custom in the Laran house that, while I was not out adventuring, we were either both there or we were both gone.

The library, while overflowing with material about the lost continent and elves, there was precious little about the warforged predating the House Cannith creations. I was relieved in a way to know that nobody should know of my existence. At the same time, I was again left to want of information about where I had come from.

While I studied, I made myself available should Thea venture into the library, but I did not see her. From time to time I would feel as though I was being watched, but I could see no one around when I looked. When she did not come to find me, I journeyed the hallways of the school hoping to see her somewhere, but I did not. The more I tried to passively run into her, the more I became aware that she could be trying to avoid me. I even spoke with the head of her department, Veril Navahn, who told me that she was around but had stepped out.

Rather than give-up, however, I became more persistent in my efforts to find her, ultimately waiting through a full day were she should have been working, feeling my observer even there. I began to think that the presence that I feel must be her, it must be Thea, and that she is avoiding me. I did not wish to confront her, but I did want to do so if it could not be on her terms, so I wrote a letter for Veril to pass to her.

Thea,

I think I can sense that you have been near, but are avoiding me. Mayhap I did something wrong when last we met; mayhap you are afraid that I will hurt you again. I intend neither. We are bound in some way, you and I, and I want to understand how. I also want to understand you.

I am certain that you know where to find me when I am here and mayhap when I am home. Please find me.

Naomi

The next morning I returned to study and was greeted by the feeling of my observer again. This time however, the feeling was stronger and more focused. She had come as I requested, but seemed to be conflicted in doing so.

I tried to fashion a reassuring smile as I greeted her, “Good morning.”

I continued to speak to her, getting her to take a seat across from me, but she did not want to be there. She admitted to being afraid of the feelings that she has for me, and I told her that understanding those feelings is why I had sought her out again. She told me that I had been recovered from Cyre, but that the records of precisely where were lost. The crate that she found me in was still in the library though far out of the way, and she agreed to take me to see them.

When we arrived in the room, Thea kept her distance. I looked at the crates and asked a few questions, but I also tried to talk to her and tease a bit to see if she would relax. Instead of making her smile, I made her cry. When I tried to comfort her again she thrust herself upon me, our lips meeting and I felt the electricity between us flare. I could not give in though, and I knew that I had to be strong for both of us, so I held her tight and tried to calm her emotions with my words. She relented only after I pinned her arms and prevented her from moving.

Finally, we talked more about the circumstances of how she found me and what she knew of my awakening. She knew of no record of a statue like me in Cyre before I was brought to the University, and that I could only be identified if I was awake then if I was someone important or kept company with important people. I realized that I would probably have no way to track my past specifically in the former nation, but tried to hold onto some assurance that the answers would present themselves in time.

In the end, we parted and I knew that I might not see her again. I could sense that she would rather run away from me than have to endure time together but apart in order to resolve our feelings. I bid her a final farewell and asked that she never fear to approach me no matter where I am or who I am with. I hope she is strong enough to see this through and know peace.